Fostering Holistic Approaches and Post-Traumatic Growth in Veteran Healthcare

Valuable Resources:

www.alisonperrysower.com

In this episode, I introduce you to Alison Perry Sower (pronounced "so-er")

Alison is a Licensed Professional Counselor, military family member, and founder of the nonprofit Central Oregon Veterans Ranch. Alison began working with veterans in 2005, two years after her brother deployed for the invasion of Iraq as an Apache helicopter pilot. She served as a trauma therapist for six years in the Department of Veterans Affairs in both urban and rural settings.

In 2012 she left the VA to pursue her vision of a more holistic approach to healing veterans. Central Oregon Veterans Ranch, "a working ranch that restores purpose and spirit to veterans of all ages and eras", was established in 2014. Alison is the co-producer of the award-winning film Cover Me: The Path to Purpose, a 2022 documentary featuring the work of Central Oregon Veterans Ranch.

Alison currently works as a trauma informed nonprofit coach and consultant, presenter and educator, and is writing a professional memoir about her journey.

Today she speaks about:

Introduction of Alison Perry Sower and Her Work (0:07)

Alison's Journey and the Impact of 9/11 (1:33)

Challenges in the VA and Institutional Trauma (3:57)

The Need for a Holistic Approach (5:24)

The Central Oregon Veterans Ranch and Its Impact (7:38)

The Importance of Community and Support (10:07)

The Role of the Civilian Community (11:18)

Alison's Current Work and Future Plans (16:36)

Misconceptions About Veterans and Nonprofit Work (18:02)

Supporting Military Veterans and Families (19:25)

Join me for this episode of Mommy Heal Thyself to learn more about our veterans and the recovery journey.

Transcript
(Note, this was transcribed using a transcription software and may not reflect the exact words used in the podcast)

Speaker 1 0:07

So welcome everyone once again to another episode of mommy heal Thyself. Today we have with us Alison Perry Sower. She's a licensed professional counselor military family member and the founder of the nonprofit Central Oregon veterans Ranch, Alison began working with veterans in 2005 two years after her brother deployed for the invasion of Iraq and as an affect sorry as an Apache helicopter pilot, she served as a trauma therapist for six years in the Department of Veterans Affairs in both urban and rural settings. And then in 2012 she left the VA to pursue her vision of a more holistic approach of healing veterans. The Central Oregon veterans Ranch is a working branch that restores purpose and spirit in veterans of all ages and eras. It was established in 2014 Alison is the CO producer of the award winning film, cover me the path to purpose, a 2022 documentary featuring the work of Central Oregon veterans ranch. Alison currently works as a trauma informed non profit coach and consultant, presenter and educator, and is writing a professional memoir about her journey. So thank you so much for joining us today.

Speaker 2 1:32

Thank you for having me. It's an honor to be here. I'm excited to talk with you.

Speaker 1 1:37

Oh my goodness, you know, as I thought about preparing for your visit with us today. I was so overwhelmed, because it's to me, it's extremely appropriate, given what's happening in our world today. You know, we're in this weird deja vu space, for me, of the time before the Iraq. I don't even know how to how to even describe that. And what comes to mind to me is that it is that it is so important for us to hear your voice, to hear what you are going to share with us today, so that we can be a little less enthusiastic about the prospect of moving forward in the direction that it looks like things are going. So without me even further going on, can you just share with us what is it that brought you into this realm in the first place? Well,

Speaker 2 2:23

it comes back to exactly the time that you're talking about. Michelle and I started graduate school in Portland, Oregon, one month to the day after 911 so literally, October 11, 2001 beyond the west coast was different. There didn't seem to be the same kind of gut wrenching, heartbreaking response. You know, I grew up in the southeast. I spent a lot of time in the Northeast as child, and so I kind of my brother. Serving in the military at the time, so I kind of witnessed this disconnect between the civilian world and the military. And, you know, and law enforcement first responder has come inside out, but like the disconnect between the civilian and the military world. And, you know, having been a military wife, military family, how that impacts the entire family. And so as you know, the tragedy unfolds after 911 my brother joined the military during peace time. His dream was to fly humanitarian aid missions to Latin America. His dream was to fly Black Hawks. And a year before 911 he was reassigned to the Apache which is a gunship. So Todd and I are 13 months part were very close. He ended up deploying for the invasion of Iraq in 2003 flying Apache helicopters. And so that was a turning point for me in my life, to have someone you love as you know you've been through the deployment experience, to have someone you love so dearly, who's so precious to you somewhere in another part of the world you don't even know exactly where. You don't know if they're safe, and you don't know if they're coming home or not. And so just that experience, my goal had been to get into private practice, which I did right out of graduate school. And I thought, is this it, you know? And so I ended up cold calling the big Portland VA Medical Center, and I called three times until I got a call back from a woman who had been in the VA for 30 years, and her brother had been a helicopter pilot in Vietnam. So that's how I kind of broke into the system as an unlicensed counselor. And that began the journey and then working as a trauma therapist for six years in the VA, and seeing, as you and I have spoken about before, the limitations of that medical model.

Speaker 1 4:04

So talk to us a little bit more about what you were seeing in the VA, in specifically about the limitations of the services that are provided by the VA, and what inspired you to look for something different, what would and what was that

Speaker 2 4:16

different? One of the things I'll highlight, which I like to bring to people's attention, because I'm not sure people think about this very much, but is what I call, instance, call institutional trauma. So when someone signs the guidelines serve in the military, they are no longer the autonomous agent of their own life, right? And see, we know when definition of trauma is anything that overwhelms your ability to cope, it's also the abuse of power and so and the loss of agency and the loss of control. So just a very active joint in the military can in some ways be a form of trauma, right? Like, it's like I am now, and I am now an object to be used by the US government.

Speaker 1 4:48

You know, it's important that people understand that, you know, sometimes we make fun of, oh, you're no longer a name, your number. No, that is literally the truth. You are no longer, as you said, your own agency. You are literally the property of the United States of America. You are literally now a number and no longer shooting Mac or whatever it is. Exactly. I remember asking my brother, we were

Speaker 2 5:05

actually in Florida, and we were on a road trip up to New Jersey, and it was a year after 911 and I said, and it was this time that was brewing before we were gonna go to war in Iraq. And I said, Do you think we should go to war in Iraq? And I remember him driving the car, and he was just looking at ahead, and he said, We'll do whatever the commander in chief decides. And I'm like, this is a soldier. That's not my brother. This is a soldier, you know. And so it's profound when you witness that as you know, as a family member. So I'm in the system, and I see a lot of veterans, number one, not really responding to what is hailed as the golden forms of treatment, the evidence based treatment, you know, to get, to get them what I call under the spotlight. Sometimes I call it the interrogation light, you know, we're gonna put in your room, time limited, eight sessions, you know, fluorescent lights, white walls, the ones you to talk about your deepest, darkest traumas, wounds to your soul. You know how much you hate yourself, the horrible things you did or saw in war, and we're gonna give you some medication too. Yeah, it's just, it's just, I just connect in some of that. And what is, what it was most effective was the human beings in the system who actually really cared and wanted to help. But you get a lot of people that get burned out, or a lot of people that are shut down, and so sometimes the system traumatizes everybody, including the people working in IT and but the real turning point was I've been in the system for about two and a half years at the Portland gay Medical Center, and I was getting ready to transfer to bend to Central Oregon to a community based outpatient clinic events the vac and I had a client who a young, young Iraq veteran. He was 22 he had already been in war. At 22 came from a very broken family that basically signed him up for the military. As soon as he turned 18, he came home from Iraq. He was drug and sexually assaulted by his combat buddy, the one person in the world that he trusted. This happened at a party. So this, this young man, needless to say, was very disorganized. He had severe PTSD. He was starting to have his first symptoms of paranoid schizophrenia. He was aware that he was seeing and hearing things, but he was just deeply traumatized so and he was also viewed by the system as a high needs client, sort of a problem child, and no one really wanted to work with him, so I took his case and really formed a good rapport with him, and had a social work calling was helping him with Housing and Finance and things. Well, she and I got a call one day that this young man ended up in the psychiatric ward at the VA the lockdown unit, and that he was throwing furniture and threatening staff, and it just occurred to me that he was being re traumatized in this system, you know, the loss of control, the approach that was being taken, you know, to diagnose between this again, fluorescent lights, four white walls, you know, this soulless, ugly institution, and lock you up where you have no control, no power. Now we need to keep people safe. Let's be realistic, but we have to look at how we're doing that, and how we're connecting with humans that are deeply wounded and terrified. And so I looked at my colleague, and I said, I wish we had a sheep ranch out east where we could send these vets when they got home, where they could work on the land, sleep under the stars and be in a community of other veterans. I just thought this better needs to be in a healing, nurturing setting of love with people he feels safe with, so he can come up, so he can relax and then address what's going on.

Speaker 1 7:38

And you know, that is really how you and I connected through the documentary. Cover me a path to purpose, and looking at that documentary is like a whole flood of memories and events and things that I had not thought about in a long time came back to the surface, especially, like I said, in the context of where we are today. And it's just amazing the work that you all did and continues to be done at the ranch. So I would love for you to share with us perhaps one or two of the stories that are most memorable to you that gives you that sense of hope and also sense of clarity with regards to the validity of this type of approach.

Speaker 2 8:18

Two stories come to mind. There are many, but one is from a little earlier in the first few years of the ranch. And one of the things I'm going to preface this with is talking about stigma, and the idea of stigma and how hard it is for veterans to ask for help. It's very hard to admit weakness vulnerability, that's not allowed when you're serving, you know, and so to So, one of the ideas behind this model is that it's a community, it's not a treatment center, and so it's a lot easier to say to someone, especially men, right who adapt to therapy and process emotions differently. There are similarities, and you can't always generalize, but let's just say that men tend to process things more physically and cognitively, and so getting them active is big, but for any veteran male or female, it is difficult to ask for help. So this is the idea that you invite people into community and community, and you get them engaged in taking care of things, nurturing things, having a job, feeling useful, feeling a purpose. And it's not the intimidating institution, right? So there was a veteran who was sent to us, referred to us from a housing nonprofit, and he was Iraq that with severe PTSD and suicidal ideation, and he had been in VA. Most of the events that we worked with had already been in the VA system. And then, you know, system, and then, you know, run their course with it, so to speak, as one of the young men says in the documentary. So this veteran was referred by that he said, I don't have housing issues, I don't have financial issues, I just don't want to be alive, you know. So they, they referred him to us. And again, this is another aspect, was accessibility. So he couldn't just show up to the VA and talk to somebody, right? He had to wait weeks even to get an appointment. So he came out to the ranch. He was greeted by two other combat vets. They sat down with him, then they brought him to me. I was the executive director. I wasn't doing counseling, but you know, it's just who I am. And this young man sat in the office with me for an hour, and he told me his story, and he said, I this was my last stop. I had, you know, I've had my gun in my mouth two times. And he says, The only reason I took it out is because of my dog. But he said, I just, I can't do the said, I just I can't do this anymore. And so I said, come back. You're welcome here anytime. It's almost like a family, right? We're home. You create the I heard this saying in a leadership workshop years ago that the first job of a good leader is to create a sense of home. And that's really what we did at the Veterans ranch. That's part of the model. It's a sense of welcome and come as you are, you're accepted, you're loved, and we are here to help you however. We can whatever that looks like. We're very networked in the community. Networked in the community, but sometimes just being with someone, we forget how valuable presence is. So we started coming back, and the other guys were, were we had just gotten some sheep, and we had to do sheep shearing, and we had this Australian man in the community come out, and before I know it, this veterans out there wrangling a big, huge family, like, oh my gosh, I'm just gonna get hurt. But, you know, these are combat vets. They're like, give me a challenge. Yeah, purpose. Let me do something. So anyway, he connected with these other veterans out there. He kept coming back. He ended up, and this is what we saw with so many vets. Michelle is at once, that initial level of support and connectivity was there, and they all got each other, and they can hold each other accountable, and they can encourage each other. So he is still friends with these veterans that he met, like eight years ago, and he went on to get a job and have a child and had a child and and then he came back at another point when he was having kind of a custody issue crisis. So this is another aspect of them all. It's an ongoing community. It's not like you came here, you did a program, you did a retreat, you did this, you can come back and we still want to help you, and we're here. So sense of place, sense of sanctuary, so that was just a tremendous you know, when you know you're saving people's lives, right? So not everybody that showed up was in crisis, but maybe struggling. Another veteran came out years later,

Speaker 1 11:21

if I may, just before you go on to the next I want people to really understand that this veteran who was in crisis is not an anomaly, is not an outlier. One of the most stark numbers that I have become unfortunately familiar with is the fact that 22 veterans will complete suicide each day, correct? Let me repeat that almost one veteran, veteran, sorry, per hour is completing suicide. So in the time that we are having the conversation that we're having today, someone will be not here with us by the end. And I want people to understand this, because, you know, we we look at certain movies that kind of glorify war and make it look all exciting, and it's like, yeah, hoorah, and yes, like I said, I'm a military family member, so I'm definitely in support of our troops. And at the same time, I'm a wife, I'm a mother, and I think the key part of what you shared with us is that there seems to be more of a disconnect between the civilian world and the military world of recently. You know, back decades ago, when we were in World War Two, we had the draft and we had a system where the majority of our young people were engaged in the war. Subsequently, the majority of American families were very much invested, emotionally invested, in what was happening to our service members. That is not the case today, and the majority of people that are out there mongering for war have no concept of the cost of war, right? And so I just wanted us to take that moment to have that realization of the dire nature of what is happening and why it is so critically important the work that you are doing and have done at the ranch. So I'm sorry you were going on. You brought that up, and I

Speaker 2 13:07

got chills as you were speaking, because it is important, it's important that we as people, as a culture, as a nation, as any country, do not anesthetize ourselves to the veteran experience. You know, it's easy to numb ourselves, and there's a lot of trauma in the world. There are a lot of different causes, but the reality also Michelle is that war does never it never leaves a veteran. They can live better or learn cope or find community and be thriving. But those memories, those experiences, will be with them until the very end of their lives, and they will surface and take shape in different forms across someone's lifespan. So we have to remember this isn't just something you deal with when you get back. This changes who you are, fundamentally as a human

Speaker 1 13:40

being, and it changes also all of the people that you are in contact with. It changes your spouse. It changes your children. And if it is not addressed properly, it will change even subsequent generations. Oh,

Speaker 2 13:51

and I've seen this with my brother's family, you know, it definitely has an impact. So one of the things I want to highlight about this model at the Veterans ranch that is really important, and that, and I think some people misunderstand, is this idea of the exclusivity that this is a veteran sanctuary, it's not a public park, it's not a zoo. It is meant to be a safe place. I likened it to a therapy room, a therapy group. You wouldn't let your neighbors come in and out of a therapy group. You wouldn't let your kids come to a therapy group. So it was very much, very strategic in terms of how the civilian population and the community were engaged, as well as in your case, it will be different, because you're going to have female veterans and their children and their family, and that's in this in this setting, and you'll need your own protective barriers around that. In and of itself, it looks different for each population, but I can tell you that the veteran who showed up actively suicidal would not be feeling safe or opening up if there were civilians in that so he was received by his brothers and sisters. So another, another story is of a veteran who who was an Afghanistan combat vet, who started coming out once a week with his mom, who was actually an Army vet, and he he had dropped out of college, he had been going to school, and he just had so much anxiety, it was hard for him to leave the house. And he could not even tolerate being in school. So he's trying, you know, to move forward with his life. But he, but he but he's debilitated by post traumatic stress and anxiety. So he starts coming out once a week, and they start helping grow lettuce in the greenhouse, or, you know, we had a hydroponics greenhouse, as you know. So he starts coming out, then they start coming out a little bit more. Then they start helping with events. We're doing events in the community, which is huge for veterans. A lot want to stay off the radar. Especially PTSD, you know? Off the radar, especially PTSD. You don't want to be out there with the public. So he just started getting more and more involved. And then it was almost two years later, I didn't see him anymore, and I asked one of the other veterans, I said, well, where's Where's so? And so he said, Oh, you didn't know. He said he went back to school, and he said it was the act of going to the veterans ranch and feeling safe, and the act of repeatedly getting out of his isolation and being around other people to where he felt confident enough and calm enough to take that next step. So I sometimes used to get the ranch is like an incubator. It's like a like a stomping ground. You get out of the military, you come here, you you find peace, you find support, you find your new sense of purpose because you feel calm enough and supportive enough to begin to take those next steps.

Speaker 1 16:00

It's almost like returning to the safety of the womb. You know that it's nourishing, it's warm, it's familiar, absolutely wonderful. So you know, as we start to wind up for today, I would love for you to tell us more about where you are now, because we are definitely going to be including the link to your website in the show notes. And I want everyone to go to that website, because not only has Alison started to expand, but in her website that there's a link that goes back to the documentary, because it's available now on Amazon, where you can either rent it or own it or whatever it is. And I encourage everyone to please click on that link and go ahead and rent it or own it. It's like 99 cents. You can do that, and I'm sure that the funds from that are being shunted over to the ranch to help them to continue to do the phenomenal work that they're doing. And in addition to that, I know that Alison is birthing a little wonderful entity right now called a book. So tell us a little

Speaker 2 16:54

bit more. It's a painful birthing process. I know my goal is to have to have the book Released just before the 25th anniversary of 911 which will be next year. So it's a professional memoir that it's about the experience of being a military family member by experience as a trauma therapist in the VA for six years, and then the journey of starting the veterans Ranch, which is currently in its 10th year of operation. So I am currently working as a coaching consultant, and I am helping people around the country who want to implement similar models. I working with people at varying levels. Some are some are in the concept phase. Some have been running an existing nonprofit. Want to develop a new program. I'm putting together a group for any of your listeners that might be interested. It's going to be called the founders club, and it's going to be a group that focuses on helping people get started, helping them understand what a nonprofit is, how to get one started, and then implementing models of care similar to this. And it can be if they want to do retreats or veteran related but it still provides some support and education and guidance to people who want to do the amazing work and the difficult work of running nonprofits, but it's life changing work. It's life changing work.

Speaker 1 17:48

Now, before you leave, can you share with us what is a common misperception that you have found or you've encountered in doing this work,

Speaker 2 17:57

about veterans or about nonprofit work? How about veterans? About

Unknown Speaker 18:02

Yeah? About veterans? Yeah.

Speaker 2 18:05

I think there's a misconception that all veterans have PTSD. I think there's still a lot of stigma publicly, some of these traumatic public events that we hear about with shootings or there's usually some other mental health component to that, whether it's schizophrenia or it's a personality disorder, but somehow everything gets lumped into the crazy PTSD event, and I think that's a tragic misperception of veterans. What we fail to realize is the diversity of experience within the veteran population. You and I have talked about female veterans. They have their own unique experience. Sometimes it overlaps. Sometimes they've been in war. I think another misconception, frankly, is that people don't realize that men suffer from sexual assault in the military as well. I worked with many male clients who had had from from Vietnam era to current era, who were sexually assaulted in the military. So I think that's that's something people don't even consider. But people are struggling with chronic pain. They're struggling with back issues, and we're starting to see cancers and other conditions related to exposure to toxic chemicals. So I think we really need to realize this is not a one and done. This is not a come home and go to the VA and get help and you're better. This is an ongoing journey, and for many of our veterans, they are living with these chronic conditions and chronic pain, and it's more important than ever that we provide them these communities where they can thrive in a spiritual, psychological way, despite whatever physical, emotional, mental injuries they're dealing with.

Speaker 1 19:17

And what would be your guidance to our community in terms of how we can best support our military veterans and military families,

Speaker 2 19:26

I would say, show a sincere interest and curiosity, not not being nosy or invasive, but just saying, Thank you for your service. Some, some veterans don't like hearing that, but just saying, oh, what branch Did you serve in? Or when did you serve? Or do you have any experience at all? Maybe your grandfather was at World War Two vet. Maybe your dad was a Vietnam vet. Bring that up. Bring that up, bring that try to make just some connection, or, you know, or maybe you just, just be authentic and recognize and never, never have any preconceived notions about any veteran that you're dealing with, because they are just as diverse as the general population. But just be authentic and curious without preconception.

Speaker 1 19:58

Well, thank you so very much. And the only thing that I would add to that is for us to be very, very aware that war is not glorious, and there are always, always casualties, far beyond what you will ever see on TV or in social media. This is the non sexy stuff that nobody wants to talk about. This is the dark stuff that really is the underbelly of war times, and unfortunately, it's the very stark reality for millions of our fellow Americans today, historically and unfortunately, probably moving into the future. So in its art and one more I was

Speaker 2 20:30

going to build on what you amplify what you said, because it is, it is up to people like you and me, and me and a lot of your listeners to shed light and to bring the light to that darkness

Speaker 1 20:38

Exactly. Thank you so very much Alison for taking the time to share that with us and remember everyone to be sure to click on the links in the show notes, to go to Alison website, and at the very least, please, please, please, go ahead and download, buy, rent, whatever it is the documentary. Cover me until next time peace and blessings recording stopped.

Speaker 2 20:59

That was super awesome. I feel like we could have talked for a lot longer, but I like that you do a half hour because people are so bombardment Exactly. That's

Speaker 1 21:07

why we have it. We have a strict rule of trying to keep it around 25 minutes, because, as you know, people are caught up with so many things, and I want to just be a bite size. And then the other thing is, you don't want it to be too overwhelming. You want it to be just like a little bite at

Speaker 2 21:18

a time, a little bit. I have a veteran that sent me, someone referred to me to connect with him. He's a Navy Seal, and he started an organization too, and he sent me his podcast interview. And it's like an hour and 20 minutes. I'm like, I'll try to listen to it. Nobody else is sending you stuff. It's like, where is it?

Speaker 1 21:31

But speaking of that, if you know of any female veterans or female family members that are willing to share their story, please, um, send them my way so that, because what I'm planning to do is a series of podcasts pertaining to this particular issue as so one for

Speaker 2 21:46

you, a woman named Liz Esther Brooks. I met her when I was there. She was worked for Oregon Department of Veterans Affairs, and she just came out with a book about her own military experiences. She'd be a really

Speaker 1 21:54

good I got several, but all Yeah, and particularly if they have children, because we want to really highlight the impact that it has on subsequent generations. Would you be able to just send me a little paragraph? Yeah, I'll send you the same one that I gave to you before, and you can just put and send it to everybody else. Send me something about that, about the collecting female veteran stories. Well, I'm, I'm going to put that into the paragraph, into what we're saying, okay, okay, okay. And then I can, I can share that, tell them how I know you, and then share that with them. Yeah,

Speaker 2 22:20

exactly, absolutely, yeah, they're the unheard voices many times. Yeah, that's,

Speaker 1 22:24

that's what I've come to realize. And like I said, I I hadn't even processed the experiences that I went through as a military wife, you know, because you kind of, like, chuck it up to like, well, everybody goes through that, but no, everybody does not go through that. You know, while you're in it, you're just, you're just working to survive. And you don't really, you don't really take account of exactly how impactful that experience has been. And now I'm even starting to go back and have conversations with the children, you know, because, again, I didn't think about that. I didn't think about how it was impacting them. You know, are all kind of in survival mode. You're kind of like you said.

Speaker 2 22:54

You're just living in a moment. It's one of my veterans said this long time ago. So you can't see the picture when you're inside the frame, and you know it's either someone else outside the frame, or it's looking back in hindsight that you see, oh my gosh.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai